You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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