I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
home. puking in laundry basket.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize
