Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Randomize
