i was rollin on her like bob the builder
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
