The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
