just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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