how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Randomize
