when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
