Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize