My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
