It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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