We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
