she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Randomize
