Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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