Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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