oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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