this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize
