found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
