i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
