It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
