whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
