Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
