Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
