it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
