I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Randomize
