I wish i was in the wii world.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
