holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
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