dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize