If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
