I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize
