Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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