loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Someone shattered a urinal.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
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