My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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