Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
You've changed since you got that strap on
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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