He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
how does that bad decision feel?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize