tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
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Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
