in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize