I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
is it fun? or sober?
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
