Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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