He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
