a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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