Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
