heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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