it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize