Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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