Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I'm getting married
To pizza
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
