Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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