You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I faked an abortion last night.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
