At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Buhtt sex?
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
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