I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
She even gives head with a lisp.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
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